never post on here. need to vent
i fucking hate today
i have been studying for about four days for this fucking practical, and when it finally comes the time to take it, i fucking bomb it. i fucking forget everything i learned. i fucked up, big time. this all fucking sucks so fucking much. i fucking hate this injury so fucking much. i can’t stand my brain or anything else.
the interview was on karl’s two years since he passed away. i couldn’t answer the questions right. i couldn’t be me. my head was somewhere else. karl, was one of my best friends…. and he has been gone for two years. and this job was something i really needed and wanted. but no. of fucking course i don’t get it. but you do. fuck you. everything always go great for you. fuck you. i hate how shit works so fucking great for you. all the fucking time. i work so much harder than you. but no.
why are you complaining about this? you don’t know what a real injury, or illness, or anything in that matter is. really? its not that big fucking deal. you’re acting like something fucking devastating happened to you. you’re such a fucking baby. like do you understand what the fuck i went through? actually i am stil fucking going through this shit. my brain is fucked up. and you worried about something so fucking stupid. holy shit.
i can’t deal with anything anymore. i want to go home. i want to run. i want to fix everyhting. i want shit to go my way for once. help me out. someone. cause i can’t deal with this anymore
